You may be surprised to hear that extinguishing your fears can be a lot of fun.
Fear extinction is the process of reducing fear by creating non-fearful memory associations. For example, if you have a fear of approaching men and have had a bad experience in the past, it’s normal that you’ll become more nervous the next time around. However, if you’re able to get back on the horse and create a new experience you will form new (and more pleasant) memories associated with flirtation.
This alternate set of pleasant memories will compete with the original fearful memories and soon you’ll become more confident and courageous than you ever imagined. Go you!
Did you know PLAYFULNESS is one of the best tools you can use to breakthrough fear? Let me share an experience I had the pleasure of witnessing – one of my clients stepped outside the box by using humor to overcome her fear. Do what she did and you will be building your confidence in no time.
Basically she was mesmerized by a man she was admiring from afar ( this was at a conference) and wanted to find out if he was available – but wow were her screaming meemies doing a big time revolt in her stomach and creating fear…
Determined to break her pattern she took a deep breath, gathered her courage and sauntered over to her dream man…she smiled and asked him if she could ask him a question….he was in a hurry and asked if it was a quick question – she assured him it was and then she playfully told him a friend greatly admired him and loved his energy and wanted to know if he was available…
Although he said he was in a “new” relationship his curiosity was piqued and he suddenly had lots of time to find out more about this mystery woman “friend” of hers. When she did the big “reveal” he was blown away and incredibly flattered and she felt totally empowered.
When we debriefed afterwards she was positively giddy and glowing!
The big “get” is when you approach things in a fun way you feel light and your nervousness disappears. No matter what the outcome you are relaxed and able to absorb and receive it without feeling embarrassed or ashamed. Like a duck you let it roll off your back. You can feel gratified knowing you took a chance – a chance that most would not – and because of this you feel fan-tas-tical and very proud.
This new playful experience and the resulting pride will create a new memory for you that will help to banish your fear. Get ready for the new bold, beautiful, courageous you!
Get your deliciousness on and start playing like my client. You’ll be building your confidence to the nth degree !!!