Alright, ladies, May is here! We’re going to celebrate the unofficial start of summer with a series of posts aimed at sparkling vibrancy! We’re going to be clearing space, literally and figuratively, to make way for bigger and better things. I want to kick off the month by talking about one of the most common stumbling blocks to your radiance and well-being: reactive behavior.
Do you find yourself dialing a friend to vent at every twist and turn of your awful breakup, dreadful friend drama or frustrating work expectations? OK gals, I can remember going through my divorce and having diarrhea of the mouth about every foul thing my husband did – and you know what? It didn’t make me feel any better, as a matter of fact, I always felt worse. If this is sounding familiar?
I promise you; you’re not alone. Yes, I know only too well how feelings of resentment, disappointment, and depression can drive you crazy. Sitting with those feelings is hard but trust me when I tell you that complaining about how others are mistreating you will only keep you in a downward spiral and leave you feeling empty.
So, what’s a gal to do? Here are three great techniques to help you rise above your unconscious reactive behavior.
Rewrite the Story
When your peeps call and want the latest update on your cheating husband, the boss who’s been taking credit for your work, or the ex-best friend who just stabbed you in the back, instead of immediately spilling every messy detail of your situation, why not simply change the story?
Tell your friends and family that you are beginning to see the light, you are feeling pretty good about the situation, and you are expecting everything to resolve itself. Even if this is not true at the moment, continuing to say the words out loud will manifest goodwill for you and shift your feelings around the issue. Trust me, as soon as you share this new outlook, you’ll feel light and positive, and much, much happier.
This is your new best friend!! Every beautiful blank page is waiting with baited breath for you to pen your most private thoughts – without any judgment! So the next time you feel the urge to grab your cell phone and vent to the first friend who’ll pick up, grab your journal instead. In the time it takes to have a conversation you can dump your thoughts in stream of consciousness writing. This is fast and furious writing- no censoring, no judgment. Pure freedom of expression. When you are done, read it and go a step deeper. Ask yourself why you are so irritated and see what comes up. Then write about that!
Awareness is the first step to healing and will surely help you soar from the depths of despair.
Taking a yoga class would be ideal, but if you can’t get to one, Dynamic Breathing is the next best thing. And you can do it anywhere: car, office, home. Start by breathing in deeply through your nose – picturing white light entering your body. Then exhale through your mouth, picturing all negativity flowing out of you. Dynamic breathing is both a cleansing and centering exercise. You will feel immediate peace – able to see things with a brighter, clearer, more positive perspective.
Here is my promise: If you implement these techniques you’ll feel empowered and proud instead of empty, and I think we can both agree that’s a much better place to be!