The thirst for a life you love is so strong you can taste it. Ahhh… to have the freedom to be bold, beautiful and bodacious – to finally lift the veil and be seen – to easily express the many facets of your femininity.
Yes, yes and hell YES!
Until your best friend questions what you’re doing, your honey isn’t thrilled with the new you and things start getting hard – the curve balls have arrived.
Anyone who’s dared to dream knows that the initial excitement will eventually be met with some form of obstacle or resistance. So, how do you stay the course and overcome the challenges that pepper the path to your dreams?
The first step is to recognize that a challenge is not a dead end. Indeed it’s a growth opportunity – a chance to become more mentally strong, develop your self-worth, own your value.
When a challenge arises, it’s important to keep a positive mindset and not to give up. After all, a detour on the way to work wouldn’t keep you from getting to your end destination. So why would you let a detour on the path to your dream keep you from reaching your aspirations?
Today I’m going to share the 3 most common obstacles people encounter on the way to their dream and how to recognize these culprits and lasso them.
Viva la dream building!
The 3 Biggest Obstacles to Achieving Your Dream & 3 Solutions
Obstacle #1 – Self-doubt
Fear, doubt, and worry are like leeches to your dream. The ego will keep you doubting your decisions, fearful of change and questioning if you can really do this thing. It will tell you all the reasons why you can’t reach your goal. Its job is to protect you in a safe little cocoon and therefore it will resist any form of growth and expansion in your life.
Solution #1 – Know your WHY
When you feel fear and anxiety creeping up, you’ll need to step out of that thought pattern. Take a deep breath and begin to focus on the “why” of your dream. Why is it that this dream is important to you? When your “why” is big enough, the how will appear.
Ask yourself, what’s one step you can take from where you are right now, with what you have, to move toward your goal?
Your dream vision will unfold one step at a time. Even the longest journey begins with just one step. What one step can you take now?
Obstacle #2 – Sabotaging Habits
Most people want a life that’s warm, fuzzy and filled with fulfillment. Yet we go through life blaming our circumstances for the life we have, not realizing we are responsible for co-creating life with our thoughts and words. We let our sabotaging habits run the show and then feel like a victim. If we are dissatisfied yet do nothing to change, we will continue to live a mediocre life at best.
Solution #2 – Become the Leading Lady of Your Life
Take responsibility for creating the life you want. You are the leading lady of your own life. Do the work to “know” what you want and “choose” those things. You are in the driver’s seat to create the life you love. You can move out of victim mentality, out of feeling stuck, and out of being irresponsible for life’s outcomes. You can choose to move into responsibility, possibilities, personal power and limitless opportunities.
Obstacle #3 – Distractions
Distractions can keep you stuck in a rut. Have you ever started on a priority but you look around and there’s the laundry or there’s a pile of mail you haven’t gone thru? Then you notice there’s that drawer you wanted to clean out, or you get a call from a friend and instead of letting it go to voice mail you pick up and spend an hour chitchatting with her, or you check your email or get on Facebook?
These distractions can keep you on a permanent detour from getting to your dream!
Solution #3 – Stay focused & Set boundaries
Achieving your dream is going to require focus and effort. Set aside time regularly to work toward your aspirations. Treat this time as a VIP priority. Make sure you turn off all distractions. Put your phone on silent and close your email application.
Think of distractions as your archenemy in the field of your dreams.
Remember the importance of achieving your goal as you create your vision. If any distractions start to pop up, remember what they are and that you can make a choice of how to deal with them.
It’s time to take center stage and harness the power, control and responsibility for your thoughts and actions so you can be empowered to create the life you love.
Here’s to being bold and unstoppable on the path to your dream. You CAN do it! I believe in you. Happy visioning!
Love to hear your comments – was this helpful?
How about you?
What do you want to create, bring in, live into?
Wherever you are with your plans for the New Year, I want to shake things up for you. Just as I realized in order to expand I’ll have to live on the edge of my comfort zone, so will you if you want to live your best life.
Scary? You bet.
But wow – garnering your gumption to step outside the box can also be exhilarating and create the confidence you crave to be the leading lady of your life.
You see, living your BEST year involves a commitment to a way of being. It’s realizing that life is full of choices and that we are each empowered to make choices that bring us the most joy, the most growth and the most fulfillment.
For me that means overcoming the fear of being judged, being seen. Not caring what others think, staying true to my inner guidance even when it’s in conflict with those I love.
What does it mean for you?
Last year I learned a powerful lesson from listening to a group of iconic women. They shared their secrets to a happy and fulfilling life. What do you think they said?
If you guessed taking risks and stepping out of your safety zone you are right on the money.
According to these inspiring women, that’s when life becomes magical and you are truly living into your genius and greatness.
Click here to read the full article and learn 3 hot tips on how to shake up your routine and live life to the fullest.
If you want you can stop reading and check out the opportunity right now:
I remember stepping into 2014 with a mission – stop living life like it’s a dress rehearsal and start living out loud. A burning desire to be of higher service became the focus of my year - mind you I had no idea what that looked like or how to make it happen – so I prayed and trusted I would be guided.
Sure enough I was led to attend a life-changing event that taught me how to live “as if” my vision was already happening (nothing like ” The Secret” – remember that movie? I watched it 60 times and never saw a single result. DreamBuilder LIVE is the real thing). I’ll never forget the tears that streamed down my face during an exercise where I literally felt myself living my dream – to say it was powerful would be an understatement.
I left the event with an incredible peace – still not knowing HOW it was going to happen but having that inner knowing that it WOULD happen.
After the event, to be honest, I got busy and kinda forgot about it until a few months later when a tremendous opportunity landed in my lap. An invitation to go to Africa to be of service – to speak to a group of 400 teachers on issues of women’s empowerment and leadership in Liberia and deliver water systems to 3 villages. I was thrilled and immediately remembered “the event” I had attended that allowed me to have the dream – my friend and mentor Mary Morrissey’s DreamBuilder LIVE.
This provided me with a HUGE lesson – permit yourself to dream, really FEEL it to be true, TRUST if it’s meant to happen the opportunity will present and then… LET IT GO.
DreamBuilder LIVE is a life transforming experience. You won’t see things the same way afterwards. You will truly have new eyes. The results you’ll create will take your life to awhole new level just like it did mine. I want that for you
If you haven’t heard of Mary Morrissey, here are just a few of her credentials: best-selling author of 3 books, had her own PBS special, created 2 multi-million dollar businesses, spoke 3 times at the United Nations, held week-long meetings with His Holiness The Dalai Lama, the list goes on and on… you know I only steer you to the cream of the crop – and that would be Mary – you will LOVE HER!
The normal public ticket rate for Mary’s DreamBuilder LIVE is $1495 but she is allowing me to offer it to you for $329 – it’s an exclusive Friends & Family rate for the people I care about. (Yes, you!) I LOVE IT when I get to bring you the very best stuff like this!
But that amazing rate is NOT FIXED. It will keep going UP as we get closer to the event (in January) or until tickets sell out. So grab your spot now:
Let me just say that this is THE international manifest-your-dreams event of the year, and it ALWAYS sells out.
You’ll create a vision for your life, network with heart-centered professionals from all over the world, and make quantum leaps in your business and personal wealth building strategies!
DreamBuilder LIVE has huge momentum now, with people flying in year after year from all over the world to be there (50+ countries!).
Listen to what attendees have had to say about this amazing event by watching the video on the registration page
All I can say is: You definitely want to be in that room where dreams are born. This is an event that truly transforms lives. But the tickets sell out super fast every time, and the Friends & Family rate will keep increasing as the event approaches, so don’t miss out!
Here’s that link to the private “friends and family” website. This is a very high-class event, and you can go for the cost of materials. My advice is: Jump on it!
I can’t wait to hear about your experience
Today is a very special day – it’s a day to dream, to blossom, to expand, to recommit to living as the off the charts happy, fun-loving, successful (whatever that means to you) person you desire to be.
If you are like most people you’re setting goals and resolutions for 2015. Seeing it as a chance to start fresh – to do things differently than last year, change those habits that kept you from living the life you REALLY want.
The truth is, as most of you know either from personal experience or observing loved ones, very few people actually realize their resolutions. The initial excitement wears off, “triggers” get the best of you, nasty radiance robbers get super clingy and those sabotaging habits win out.
BUT…here’s something you may not know – there are ways change happens and ways change doesn’t.
After hearing renowned author and psychologist, Dr. Henry Cloud, speak at my church about how to create success with resolutions, I wanted to share his research with you so you can make sure you get the change you desire this year.
Let 2015 be the year you learn how to make change happen!
Dr. Cloud started with a personal story about how he travels a lot for work and had consequently put on a good deal of weight. After reading a self-help book on how to take the weight off, came to the conclusion that setting a goal, setting a resolution and saying I’m going to do this differently – and then doing it…doesn’t work.
He realized he couldn’t do it on his own – he needed to reach outside of himself for help. So he hired a personal trainer to reach his fitness goal and that worked.
He went on to say there are two systems of change in the universe:
a. The Law
The Law goes something like this:
a. You set a standard that you want to be
b. You have the rules on how to get there
c. You try to reach it and every time you don’t you are counting how much you have failed
d. You start focusing so much on the failure the dream goes by the wayside.
Change doesn’t happen like this. Period.
Grace has to do with unmerited favor. That means that something is brought forward for us to reach that standard. This is important because most of us don’t have the self-discipline to do it on our own.
Grace brings discipline that you on your own don’t possess. That looks like a friend or support group or coach that shows up consistently to help you stay the course. Simply put, self-discipline is born out of other discipline. That’s Grace. Having others bring to you what you do not possess.
Our natural thinking around change is to think, “This is how I ought to be” and we try to reach upwards to achieve that standard. This is The Law.
And Grace is about the standard coming down to you – giving you the tools and support to help you stay the course.
Sometimes we need a wake up call. God/The Divine/Source whatever you believe in will often give us a nudge (and if that doesn’t work it’s a 2 x 4 ouch!) to help us see what is lost or broken in our lives. He wants us “get it” – to heal and have a better life. Fortunately you will be guided, if you listen, to something or someone to help you course correct.
Maybe your relationship just broke up and you are heartbroken and you want to get back to who you used to be – a grief support group or coach will suddenly pop up to help you get through the pain. Otherwise it can be overwhelming and a lengthy healing process.
This is Grace – someone giving you what you don’t possess to help you reach the standard.
If you have a child think about sitting down and giving them the skills and abilities to work thru a class rather than say they better get a certain grade. This is Grace.
When we use our gifts to benefit each other we are living on purpose – we are sharing the various forms of Grace.
The various forms of Grace are what you do for your kids and loved ones and what your friends, support groups, coaches do for you – give the strength/tools to help reach the standard when you don’t possess the know how or discipline.
So wherever you are with your plans for 2015, I invite you to reach for Grace to ensure your resolutions are successful and you can enjoy your best year EVER:))
Sometimes you hear something and it’s shocking – really floors you.
That’s how I felt when I discovered 3 out of 4 women experience chronic stress. And now with all the holiday extra’s thrown in, it could be even higher.
Mama mia how to keep your sparkle with all that radiance robbing going on?!
So be honest, how are YOU holding up? Do you have a plan in place to combat the seasons stress bandits?
As a woman you know all too well how stress can affect your energy leaving you feeling tired and out of sorts. It’s easy to lose sight of your divine radiance when you’re juggling the day-to-day demands of life. Even the most evolved woman will occasionally feel out of touch with her strengths.
Can I be honest with you? I’m right there with you – the last few weeks have been rough both professionally and personally with my dad back in the hospital.
So I did something that brought peace AND joy back into my heart and I’d like to share it with you in hopes that it will help you get happy too.
It’s something so easy and simple. Sometimes we forget how easy it is to get out of the rabbit hole to feel “whole” again.
Click here to read the full article and learn a quick tip to help shake off the holiday slump and revitalize your spirit.
One important thing I’ve learned about living a life of happiness that’s full of richness is that it requires one very special ingredient – FUN!
No matter what is going on in your life if you are able to laugh and play you can endure anything! When you are having fun the heavy veils lift, the sky’s open and fairy dust comes pouring down to brighten your heart and give you a fresh perspective.
This time of year is perfect to add some fun into your life – there are so many festive things to do for the holidays.
Are you in?
I know you have a lot on your plate this month but before you say you don’t have time consider the cost of pushing yourself to exhaustion:
a. crazy stress that affects your health
b. short tempered – maybe even yelling at your kids unnecessarily
c. feeling disconnected in your relationships
e. so tired you collapse at the end of the day only to get up the next day and do it all over again.
Woudn’t it be great to give your mind and body a break? To love yourself enough to say, “Hey, I deserve to enjoy my life and I know if I’m happy that’s going to flow out to my kids, partner, friends, co-workers and make everyone’s life happier!”
And that’s the key – it’s our connection to self and others that gives life it’s richness and adds meaning to our precious time on earth.
There is a ton you can do on your own or with friends and family this month. I have some annual traditions I’ll share with you plus other idea’s you can engage in to bring a sparkle to your soul:
a. Holiday walks on trendy shopping streets (The pic above is me and one of my best gal pals kicking off the holidays on Montana Ave in Los Angeles)
b. Listen to your favorite holiday songs and sing your heart out
c. Dance to Santa Baby while baking sugar cookies
d. Walk or jog thru a neighborhood with holiday lights (I did this the other night and went 6 miles I was so mesmerized!@)
e. Cozy up with a holiday movie and a cup of eggnog – ( have you seen The Last Holiday with Queen Latifah or Holiday with Kate Winslet and Cameron Diaz? Sooo feel-good happy!!)
f. Charity based home tours decorated for the season (just did this over the week-end with some friends and it was so festive).
g. Church music programs – doing this Sunday with several friends
Taking time for yourself is crucial but it’s also super important to touch base and reconnect with your girlfriends. This connection is critical for living a magnificent life – it allows you to taste a smidgeon of the carefree life we had before work and family responsibilities became our priority.
Your friends love you, laugh with you, and stand by your side when facing fears and upsets. They validate that you are not alone, crazy, or paranoid. They inspire, support and uplift you, providing the type of therapy that no money can buy because it’s all wrapped in loving care.
As a matter of fact, research now tells us friendships are even more critical to our health and well-being than family relationships. Just one more reason to revel in the joys of girl time this holiday season!!! Now go have some fun!!!!
Love to hear your thoughts on this article – please leave your comments below.
Ever feel like you’ve lost touch with who you are?
Does it seem like it’s up to you to do everything and there’s not a moment to yourself?
Let’s face it – the ups and downs and curveballs in life will test you on every level – emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually. To be totally transparent my life at one time was fraught with breakdown in every area – marriage, career, finances and friendships. It was a struggle to clear the clutter, focus and follow through to get to where I am now, positively impacting thousands of women. In all honesty, there were plenty of incredibly painful moments.
After my divorce when I began to rebuild and create a happy life I had to develop a new mindset. I have to admit, at first it was difficult for me to stop blaming others for my lot in life, forgive and forget, get honest and start taking responsibility for my part.
Initially turning my thoughts around seemed an impossible feat, like turning the Titanic around. But as time went by, I was able to stop the suffering, because I was tired of my thoughts taking me down the rabbit hole and I knew that having a happy life was the way out. And, I chose it, and got behind it energetically, with the help of my friends, mentors, healers and God.
I realized I needed mentorship, connection to the Divine, and some serious community support to be able to clear the cobwebs, keep focus and move forward with strength and grace.
And, I found it. I discovered the tools to shift the unhealthy thinking, fill my heart with love and take my power back and I’m totally in love with my life. But more importantly, I’m crazy for my clients and love teaching them what I’ve learned.
I want YOU to have the tools to take your power back so that your life is on fire with fun and emotional freedom – bigger than your fears.
Your fear is never going to go away. You just have to make your commitment to your happiness stronger.
If you know you’re always one foot in and one foot out and have a difficult time keeping your heart happy and your mind peaceful, click here to schedule a chat with me. I’ll give you a plan that works.
In the meantime, if you have a heavy heart, try this short exercise I use – it works wonders to take your power back.
• Sit or lie down and start breathing into your heart.
• Imagine all the people who have bruised, hurt or squashed your heart – lovers, family, friends, bosses, teachers etc.
• Start pulling the energy back that you’ve given away with the painful memories/thoughts. See it like a rope of golden energy, being pulled back to your heart, hand-over-hand pulling it in, bringing it home.
• See the golden energy flow into your heart and feel it become expansive with wisdom and reclaimed power.
• Wrap your heart with the gold energy and seal it.
Voila! You’ve just taken your power back in a matter of minutes. How do you feel? Notice the energy coming back in felt cleansed and purified – no pain! This is seriously good, yes?
Use this quick and easy tool every time you feel funky and you will be back to your brilliant self pronto!
If this article made a difference for you please share your comments below:)
Sunday night a very wise speaker, Dr. Drew Sams, opened my eyes and mind with a powerful question. It had such an impact on me I want to share it with you.
What are you pouring your life into?
He began by holding up a bottle of Veuve Clicquot and talked about its value. Depending on the restaurant and time of year (New Year’s Eve being the coup d’ etat) it could range from $100 to $350 a bottle. He went on to say this champagne even holds a royal warrant from Queen Elizabeth 11. Impressive. No one in the room disagreed with him – it was acknowledged to be very valuable champagne.
Next he showed us a trashcan filled with coffee grounds, banana peels and used tissues. He then uncorked the bottle and started pouring it into the trash…getting the visual? Wow, just like that, the Veuve lost its value!
There’s something about a visual that really brings home the truth, isn’t there? You could hear a pin drop as the audience was quietly taking in the point – no matter how valuable you think you are or are perceived to be – the minute you start pouring yourself into garbage, you lose your value.
My mind immediately flew to all the things I have put my energy into both in the past and present that are a total waste of time, dilute my essence, and make me weary and downright ugly at times. Mama mia so many things!
What about you? What are you pouring your life into? Can you see where you might be engaging in behaviors that diminish your beautiful essence?
Click here to read the full article and discover a method to help you avoid these destructive behaviors.
Have you ever fooled yourself into believing you could “skip” a step or two and still get what you want?
Well I sure have. The 10K Mud Run I participated in last weekend is a great example. Since I’ve been working out with a group for the past 6 months – religiously following the schedule except for one small exercise – I thought I was in shape for this race.
It turned out I wasn’t as prepared as I thought…you see the one “small” exercise I consistently ditched was STRENGTH training and little did I know the Mud Run would have 15 obstacles (a la Private Benjamin LOL) including climbing a knotted 14 foot rope and ringing a bell – SERIOUSLY???
I couldn’t get past the first knot! In fact there were a couple of obstacles I didn’t complete because I didn’t have the upper body strength… and I quickly learned, all those work-outs I told myself I didn’t need (and avoided I might add) were KEY to my ease in getting through all the obstacles.
What I clearly got was I had been fooling myself! My coach put strength training in the mix for a reason – I had not followed her plan because I don’t like weight training – it’s HARD and BORING. So every time that exercise popped up on my workout schedule I massaged my ego with excuses that got me off the hook. But guess what? Doing it MY WAY made that race HARDER and I actually injured myself.
Not being adequately equipped for the Mud Run race made me weary and a bit disheartened humbly reminding me what I thought I was getting away with came back to bite me in the you know where LOL.
Did I ever learn a great lesson!!
Since then I have completely shifted my mindset around strength training because I now know it’s KEY in preparing me to handle challenges with more confidence and ease.
It’s only the willingness I’ve had to see what isn’t working and do the work to change it that has helped me create a life I love.
Why am I telling you this? Because this translates into every area of life and you are probably doing something similar and not getting the results you want. Ask yourself where you’re doing things your way and running up against the same problems again and again?
Avoiding something because it’s uncomfortable or hard or different or you just don’t want to do it will keep you stuck and suffering in a life that’s much more difficult than it’s meant to be.
One of my early mentors told me the only difference between successful people and people who do not achieve their dreams is that successful people do what other people don’t want to do. They are constantly challenging themselves to take it up another level with their mindset and skill set so they are prepared to navigate the curve balls of life with confidence and ease.
Question for you: where are you fooling yourself and skipping steps that will change the way you think and create new behaviors that will help you get what you want and lead a more fulfilling life?
Maybe you want a deeply loving relationship but freeze every time you want to express yourself – do you keep procrastinating getting the help you need to clear that block? Or maybe you bottle things up and when you can’t take it anymore explode hurting your kids, partner and friends – do you wave your behavior aside saying, “That’s just me” – putting off healing your anger and learning a different communication style? Or maybe you want a change in job or career – do you continue searching for jobs on the same sites, not open to trying a new resource?
Whatever it is you want in life, are you skipping steps that might seem hard now but will ultimately make your life easier?
The way you think is what got you where you are today (we’re not talking about the positive beliefs and ways of being, only the other stuff).
If you want a more fulfilling life here are 3 basic things you can do to get what you want with more ease:
- Be honest with yourself about the step you are skipping
- Change your mindset about the step you need to take
- Take action – do what you need to do and develop not only the mindset but the skill set that will allow you to go after what you want with confidence and high energy.
Practice these 3 steps and you will start living a sparkling life you love!